It’s been recently brought to my attention that I am a needy friend. This surprises me. A lot. I pride myself for being fiercely independent but it turns out, I am so not.
By the way, when I say “brought to my attention” I don’t mean people just pointed it to me. It’s a topic that’s come up several times recently and I think three times means there’s something to it.
So I started looking into it and it turns out, I am quite a needy friend.
I gave my ex bestfriend hell online and offline because I demanded so much from her and when she couldn’t meet my expectations, I took that as a sign of disrespect to my friendship – that I took our friendship more seriously than she did. We haven’t spoken to each other in almost a decade now and I’m not sure she wants to be friends with me again. All because of my issues.
I thought I’ve kicked this nasty neediness but recently, I had a conversation with hubby about it and I realised I’m at it again. I expect friends to act and be a certain way – to invite us all the time to whatever they are doing, to keep in touch all the time, to exert the effort to go to our house or invite us over to theirs, to call, to email, to organise a skype session, to attend to all the invites I send them and so on.
I am needy.
It’s an insecurity I think. I’m not sure where and when it stems from yet. I’ll figure it out. But I want to get rid of it.
I know I’m important to them, I just need to make myself believe that. I’m so needy. It sucks.
Are you a needy friend?